Dynamic School Vouchers, by Amazon

School Voucher programs are getting proposed in states like Texas where public schools are suffering under the weight of federal funding cuts and increasing populations. However, at Amazon we realized this expenditure could be innovated upon with some novel incentive and risk-management mechanisms.

Today we’re introducing Voucher+ by Amazon. Voucher+ works by educating your child proportional to the number of packages you help deliver for Amazon each month. Schools integrated with Voucher+ will receive professional development for teachers, informing them how to variably attend to and ignore your child’s precious needs.

In the private school markets of today, parents must either rack up exorbitant loans or pray for a voucher. Voucher+ by Amazon significantly reduces the expenses of private school with our patented Like-Father-Like-Son™️ variable educator tool. By providing classrooms with a “Voucher+ Deprivation Chamber”, we can dynamically adjust the amount of students being taught in every class simply by forcing children into the chambers.

Teacher: “My students are absolutely ravenous for any kind of educational stimulus when they exit the Chamber"

Teachers are informed automatically when a parent’s productivity rate is declining and students are then escorted to the quiet, white box until productivity is improved. Parents, in turn, receive a real-time a ratio of chamber-time to classroom-time that they’re creating throughout the day. This is available alongside a live video feed of their child in the chamber.

Parent: “Seeing Christina crying in the Voucher+ Chamber revs up my muscles and attention. I know it’s her future I’m actively sabotaging when I choose the bathroom over the bottle.”

If your school is interested in integrating with Voucher+ or you're an anxious parent ready to see your child in the best schools no matter what, sign up now at voucherplus.amazon.com.